If you could choose how to build your life the way you want it to look, what would you change for it? Would you have the courage to let go of your fears in favor of the things you aspire to for a better life? Do you know who you are and where you want to go, or do you feel like you want to be someone and there are obstacles holding you back? What is holding you back, are they really those obstacles or is it just your fear of your own inner strength that would give you everything you need to build the life you dream of?
Yes, people are afraid of their inner strength, the strength of their psyche, they are afraid to get out of the comfort zone of traumas or weaknesses that prevent progress. We are too used to suffering, to living in fear, victim status seems to offer some comfort, but there is no bigger joke than the one we play on ourselves. We all have gone through or will go through certain traumas at some point, life can bring with it a series of sufferings, it depends on us how we adapt to them.
It's all about our mental health. Here begins the approach to a complex topic aimed at understanding mental health, how it influences our everyday thinking and behavior, relationships with our peers, how we adapt to stressful situations, and most importantly, how we gain mental resilience to have the ability to function optimally regardless of the more difficult situations we might find ourselves in at any given time.
Understanding optimal mental health
We are tempted to think that good mental health means the absence of pathology at the psychic level, the absence of depression and anxiety. But more than that, a healthy psyche is a complex of positive characteristics that allow an easier adaptation of the individual to stressful or less happy situations that may inevitably arise during life.
Thus, a person with optimal mental health presents:
flexibility and adaptation to new situations, learning stress resistance mechanisms,
has a zest for life
maintain a balance between work and leisure,
build healthy relationships with peers,
sees the purpose and meaning of his actions,
has a sense of contentment and self-confidence.
The relationship between resilience and mental health
Life is a dynamic concept, it is always changing. If we understand this, it would be easier for us to realize that even the problems we have at a given moment will change, they will not stay in our lives permanently, if we let them go. It is about our ability to adapt and the inner strength we choose to call upon to regenerate ourselves by freeing ourselves from the wounds of the past.
Most of us go through disappointments, losses, changes in the course of life, we can suffer all kinds of traumas that leave their mark on us in one way or another. But let's not forget that everything has its purpose, let's free ourselves from questions like "Why me?", "What did I do to deserve this?", let's put the problem differently "How can I use what happened in my favor?" , "What can I learn or grow as a person from what happened?" . People may have problems, but they are not their problem, a detachment from the situation helps to find a solution much better and much faster.
This is what resilient people do: they understand that things don't always go their way, but they adapt to the situation and stay positive with the hope that they will find a solution even if not immediately. This ability called resilience is a characteristic of a strong mental health that allows the recovery from unpleasant events, the people concerned manage to remain focused, flexible and productive in their actions.
Having an increased level of mental and emotional resilience, they manage to find mechanisms to adapt to difficult situations, are less afraid of the uncertainty characteristic of the future and are more open to new experiences.
We might think that that's how they are, not all of us can be as strong and brave, but that's not really the case. There are lots of ways you can improve your mental health, become more positive and energetic, learn to manage your emotions better, and learn ways to adapt to daily stress by keeping it at a low level that- allow you to function optimally.
How to improve your mental health?
In principle, suffering is something unpleasant, it is an inner pain that is difficult to locate that prevents us from enjoying life and the fact that we simply are.
Understood differently, suffering is a signal from our ego that we are neglecting some emotional messages that our being sends us. By continuing to ignore the suffering, even though it's unpleasant, we let it reach our comfort zone, we see the problem but do nothing to combat it.
If we see that the problem is still trying to get a beneficial change from us, we distract ourselves from it with all kinds of self-destructive behaviors, we look for the solution in alcohol, drugs, something that at the moment seems to be a solution. In fact, that something is only a perpetuation of our problem because as long as we put off finding a solution we will suffer more.
The truth is you don't have to suffer, you don't have to make suffering a priority, make life a priority and enjoy it with your loved ones.
Social connection – especially face-to-face – a priority
Life can bring us enough disappointments in terms of the relationships we have with those around us, it can make us shy and distrustful of people. That doesn't mean it will always be the same, that doesn't mean we have to give up interacting with others.
We are social beings, we need positive connections and emotional relationships with others. The less happy experiences we have had in the past vis-Ã -vis this topic should not inhibit us, on the contrary, they could help us to seek healthy, constructive relationships based on real values.
A very important aspect is the face-to-face connection. We have forgotten about it since we live in the age of speed, and socializing has moved to virtual space. But let's remember that we are real people with real needs and we still need to look a man in the eye while talking to him and give him a warm hug.
There are many positives that I have brought up here. A sincere hug from a loved one is a medicine, it releases chemicals in the brain that give us a feeling of well-being and peace. Then, looking into the eyes of the man you trust, you will be more open when you talk to him about your problems, you will feel more emotional comfort when you see that he does not judge you and that he understands you, and your communication will become more positive, becoming practical much of the solution to the problem.
How to connect with others?
Most of us lead a busy life, sometimes it seems that we barely have time for ourselves, how can we find room for a meeting with a friend. Even so, this does not have to be an impediment to socializing, we can call a friend and plan an activity that we can do together.
We can call our relatives or acquaintances, we can get in touch with an old friend, we can invite a colleague to have a meal together or we can have coffee in the morning with a neighbor.
Volunteering is again a method of socializing because it brings together large groups of people and you are sure to find someone to interact with. Remember that a good mood, a smile and a greeting are a business card that can open many doors.
Moreover, your positive attitude, in addition to being good for you, also brightens the day of whoever interacts with you. So why not? Get out from behind the virtual and stay connected with people in real life.
An active life means benefits for our body and brain
Our body and mind work in sync, so physical health brings major benefits to our psyche and emotional health.
Physical activity also releases endorphins, feel-good chemicals that help us fight stress levels, improve memory, make us more energetic, more active and help us sleep better.
Maybe not all of us like to exercise, maybe not all of us lift weights at the gym or jog on a treadmill, but there are other ways you can have a physically active life. You can go for a walk in the park with a friend or your pet, you can choose to walk instead of driving your car, even dancing to your favorite music is a good mood-inducing physical activity.
Try to implement into your daily routine a program of physical activities that involve your whole body, from walking to dancing and cleaning the room, which is called active rest.
During the physical exercises you do, get rid of your thoughts, focus better on how your hands and feet move, feel your breath, feel yourself at that moment doing something beneficial for yourself. This will help you stay connected to the present and relieve the stress you feel when you think about how much you still have to do, you will feel in control.
Remember that life is about movement and you have the right to relax by doing something good for your body and mind.
Stress level control
We hear this word more and more, wherever we go, whatever we do, stress has almost become a lifestyle. We live at speed, under the pressure of what we have to do, and by including stress in it we only put more pressure on our shoulders making our work harder. This affects our physical and emotional health, it also reduces the output we would have if we worked calm, positive and confident, giving our best and understanding that we are not superhuman.
Stressors are everywhere, not all of them can be avoided, but our whole psyche can bring things into balance. A strong mental health gives us a better adaptation to stress, therefore people who show that ability called resilience will have a lower level of anxiety and will manage to keep stress under control to be productive in their actions.
How can this stress be kept under control for good functioning? By learning coping mechanisms.
Talk to a loved one. This will bring you a state of peace, it may not change the stressful situation, but it will certainly make you calmer and therefore more apt to find a solution to your situation.
Don't neglect your senses. Listen to your favorite music, smell a flower or the perfume that makes you feel good, drink a cup of tea, look at a painting you like and take yourself away from what's bothering you at the moment.
Discover what calms your agitation which, remember, is momentary, just like the difficult situation in which you find yourself. It will pass, approach it calmly and you will find the right solution. Discover yourself through the reactions you show in such moments, then after you look at the situation more detachedly you will be able to better analyze your reaction and you will improve your ways of adapting to stress factors. What will you get by doing this? What we call mental and emotional resilience and you will keep stress under control.
Remember your free time. Maybe you have a lot to do, time seems to be running out and you don't know how to cram all your activities into a few hours. Take a break, watch a good movie, talk to a friend, read a good book, do something just because you enjoy it. Take a break to remember that you are alive, that life is a miracle, that you are blessed with everything you have or don't have, give yourself a break of gratitude and thanksgiving. You will be surprised to know that after this your time has expanded considerably and you are in control of the situation.
Make relaxation a routine. In terms of keeping your stress levels under control, yoga, mindfulness meditation, deep breathing and progressive muscle relaxation are other techniques that support you in achieving good mental and emotional health.
strong mental health
Adopting a diet that supports mental health
If you've nourished your senses as mentioned above, don't forget to nourish your body as well. It is recognized that the food we eat every day has a great influence on our mental and emotional state.
Eating on the run, eating foods high in bad fats but low in nutrients, not to mention super-processed foods. All this will lead over time to affecting the state of health on all levels - physical, mental, emotional; the energy level will decrease; disrupts sleep and affects the immune system.
It would be beneficial to gradually reduce our consumption of caffeine, alcohol, fried foods, refined carbohydrates, processed or highly hormone-laden foods, and then give them up in favor of a mind-healthy diet.
We will observe the favorable effects of eating nuts, fish, avocados - foods rich in omega 3 with an important role in the proper functioning of the brain. Also, brightly colored vegetables and fruits are a supply of vitamins and nutrients that help improve our mood.
Quality sleep is worth more than we think
Sleep is another aspect of mental health worth discussing. We seem to hear more and more frequently that people have insomnia, that they don't rest properly, some wake up more tired than they fell asleep, others can't fall asleep because of too many thoughts, another part only allows a few hours of sleep because "time does not allow them".
If we think skipping sleep is a solution, our brain doesn't agree. Our neurons need to clear our thoughts before we put our head on the pillow, we can take a warm bath before sleep, listen to soothing music or read something relaxing.
Respecting the sleep-wake rhythm even during the weekend is an important aspect regarding the rest we need.
Also, the environment in which we sleep must be quiet, cool and dark so that our melatonin-secreting cells in the pineal gland can adapt to the night mode.
Our purpose and meaning in life
What do we live for? We catch ourselves at some point in life as we run panting from the everyday and looking back we see why we ran, good or less good things, but a question surprises us.
Where are we running and what is our meaning? Of course, we all have a purpose, every man has his purpose and he will find it when he is ready for it. The meaning of life is perceived differently by each individual, but it is what makes us feel useful, triggers in us the motivation to go further on a chosen path or change our trajectory to become better.
Either way, it's our meaning that gets us out of bed in the morning. Moreover, finding it leads to the generation of new cells, the construction of new neural networks and the strengthening of the immune system. At the same time, finding our meaning in life improves our mood thus helping to reduce stress levels and achieve good mental and emotional health.
Work, whether it's your paid job or work from home where you enjoy gardening, drawing, writing or taking care of a pet, any of these will make you feel active and useful.
Volunteering, in addition to the socialization I mentioned above, is also a way to feel meaningful, will teach you about kindness, compassion and loyalty.
strong mental health
Caring for an older person, a child or a pet are other meanings of life that we can find all around us and bring as many benefits to our health as to those who benefit from our care.
Now, knowing that you have so many opportunities to build strong mental health so that you can function at optimal levels and enjoy your life to the fullest, only one question remains: do you really want to acquire an iron psyche or is the circle of suffering more comfortable? Regardless of the answer, one thing is certain, the choice is ours.